I've been a horse lover all of my life. As a kid, I adored my collection of Breyer horses and played with them often. I didn't have a horse of my own back then and didn't take riding lessons as a kid either. Getting my 'horse fix' in those early years meant spending time with a family friend's Shetland Pony or riding horses at every local carnival and amusement park that I could. I remember the smell of the leather tack and the rhythmic feel of swaying in the saddle as someone handwalked the horse I was riding.
I had the opportunity to take riding lessons for the first time ever while in college and loved it! Those school horses were the best--reliable, well trained, easy to learn on and accepting of a newbie's mistakes. Fast forward to adulthood when I started up lessons again, which led to leasing a horse at that barn, then one year later, buying my very first horse of my own. His name was JD and he was my "heart horse." I promise you that he will come up again in future blog posts as he deserves his own time and space in my story. This post is focused on a time 9 years later when I purchased my 3rd horse (and first mare), Jasmine.
It is said that a horse is a mirror to your soul. I'd heard that quote many times in my early years of horse ownership; however, I don't think I had deeply experienced nor understood what it truly meant until I got Jasmine in November of 2018.
Jasmine joined my farm less than one month after I lost JD. She was calm and quiet and well trained. She had such a soft, kind eye and I immediately felt a connection with her. Fast forward to a few months later - the more she settled into the farm and the more time we spent together, the more nervous she became. I am what they refer to as a "timid rider" - someone who LOVES horseback riding, but also has a fear of riding based on past experiences I'd had with other horses.
I received TONS of well-intended advice in those early days with Jasmine - just breathe; act confident and you will feel confident; fake it until you make it; be the boss, don't let her get away with acting like that. And trust me, I TRIED all of those things. But even the thought of riding (something I LOVED to do) made my heart race even before I left the house for the barn. I couldn't fool myself and I learned that I also could not fool her - she was way too smart for that and way too sensitive to my energy (she believed what she FELT from me, not what I told her or tried to pretend to be).
It was all of this that led me to realize that the quote is VERY TRUE - a horse IS a mirror to our soul, to what we're thinking and feeling. And if you aren't connected with yourself enough to know what you think and feel, then look into the eyes of a 1,100 lb animal who can read you like an open book and you'll quickly figure out what energy you're giving off, whether you intend to or not.
So much more has happened since that time and I'll share more in future posts. But what I will leave you with for now is that we own our energy. We need to explore and understand how our energy impacts others around us (not only animals, but people too). We need to know where our energy comes from and what triggers us so we can work at releasing those patterns in our bodies and minds. And until we take a deep dive into who we are energetically and why, no amount of "faking it until we make it" or "pretending" will have any positive or lasting effect on us.
Thus began my energetic healing journey, thanks to a special mare named Jasmine.